Computer Guy (animated) W I L D  B I L L Comma S  P L A C E
@ Hostek "If you don't know where you're going, any bus will do"
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Nine-ElevenSocial CommentaryPoliticsThe Battle of the SexesBlondes Are More FunThe SouthThis Life and TimesGolfOther Humorous StuffMy Stuff
25 Signs That You've Had Too Much Of The 90's
30 Politically Correct Ways To Discuss Someone's Mental Shortcomings
30 Years Difference
Alcohol Warnings
All About Dogs
Automated Call Directing
Basic Truths
Black Testicles
Celebrity One-Liners
Did You Know?
Do You Remember?
First Day On The Job
Food Facts
Fun Reflections On Life
Hell Freezes
Hollywood Squares
Investing Key Words
IT Support
Job Interview
Language Quirks
Life Is Like A Dog
Little Known Facts
Maintaining a Healthy Level of Insanity
Management Lesson
My Bottle Rocket
New Dictionary Words
New Words for the Next Century
Newspaper Headlines
Oath Of Enlistment
Other Rules Of Life
Pet Diaries
Poor Grandpa
Potty Training
Purina Diet
Quick Thinker
Sayings That Should Be On Buttons
Senior Moments
Sex in the Shower
Shake It Off
Small World
Smarter Than Most
Survivor Show - Texas Style
Ten Cents A Drink
Thank You Letter
The Cat Years
The Christmas Dolly
The Lawyer and The Farmer
The Old Poodle
The Old Rancher
The Value of a Good Drink
The Watch
Things I've Learned From My Children
Things That Make You Go "Hmmm"
Things You Didn't Know
Thoughts For The Day
Useless Information
Watch What You Eat
We Made It!
What Really Happened To The Kursk
Why We REALLY Gain Weight
Words To Live By
Wrong Email Address
You Know You Work For The Government When…
You Know You're In California When…
Word to live by...

Friends don't let friends take home ugly men.
---Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" it's "Hi, how are you?"
---Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her sh*t.
---Men's Room, LINDA'S Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die.
---Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Make love, not war. Hell, do both, get married!
---Women's restroom, The Filling Station, Bozeman, Montana

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.
---Women's restroom, DICK'S Last Resort, Dallas, Texas

Watch out for Gay Limbo Dancers
---Inside toilet stall door, Men's restroom

Express Lane: Five beers or less
---Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

You're too good for him.
---Sign over mirror in Women's restroom, Ed Debevics, Beverly Hill, CA

No wonder you always go home alone.
---Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open.
---Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

Beauty is only a light switch away.
---Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards.
---Houghton Library, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's all get wasted together and have the time of our lives.
---Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.

God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust?
---The Irish Times, Washington, D.C.

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
---Written in the dust on the back of a bus, Wickenburg, Arizona.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal.
---Revolution Books, New York, New York

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands.
---Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on.

Travel is very educational. I can now say Kaopectate in seven different languages.

Home is where you can say anything you like cause nobody listens to you anyway.

Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?

I don't do drugs anymore 'cause I find I get the same effect just by standing up really fast.

I got a sweater for Christmas... I wanted a screamer or a moaner.

If God had intended for man to use the metric system, Jesus would have had only ten disciples!

I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected.

I have learned there is little difference in husbands/wives; you might as well keep the first.

There are two sides to every divorce: Yours and The Jerk's.

If life deals you lemons, make lemonade; if it deals you tomatoes, make Bloody Marys.

I was on a date recently, and the guy took me horseback riding. That was kind of fun, until we ran out of quarters.

I married my wife for her looks...but not the ones she's been giving me lately!

How come we choose from just two people for president and 50 for Miss America?

The next time you feel like complaining, remember: Your garbage disposal probably eats better than thirty percent of the people in this world.

Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.

Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words: "Don't pick that up, you don't know where its been."