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Tuesday, March 28, 2023 |
Nine-Eleven | Social Commentary | Politics | The Battle of the Sexes | Blondes Are More Fun | The South | This Life and Times | Golf | Other Humorous Stuff | My Stuff |
"Hickphonics," a language to be taught in all Southern schools. A speaker of this language would be a Hickophone. The following are excerpts from the Hickphonics/English dictionary:
HEIDI - noun. Greeting. HIRE YEW - Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting. BARD - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." JAWJUH - noun. The State north of Florida. Capitol is Lanner. BAMMER - noun. The State west of Jawjuh. Capitol is Berminhayum. MUNTS - noun. A calendar division. THANK - verb. Ability to cognitively process. BARE - noun. An alcoholic beverage made of barley, hops, and yeast. IGNERT - adjective. Not smart. See "Arkansas native." RANCH - noun. A tool used for tight'nin' bolts. ALL - noun. A petroleum-based lubricant. FAR - noun. A conflagration. TAR - noun. A rubber wheel. TIRE - noun. A tall monument. RETARD - Verb. To stop working. FAT - noun, verb. 1. a battle or combat. 2. to engage in battle or combat. RATS - noun. Entitled power or privilege. FARN - adjective. Not local. DID - adjective. Not alive. EAR - noun. A colorless, odorless gas: Oxygen. BOBWAR - noun. A sharp, twisted cable. JEW HERE - Noun and verb contraction. HAZE - a contraction. SEED - verb, past tense of "to see". |