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2004 Election Issue - Social Security
2029 News Headlines
A Short History of the World (according to Conservatives)
Al Gore Goes To Europe
Al Gore In Vietnam
Al Gore Went Down To Florida
Al Gore: Separating Fact from Fiction
At The Oscars
Autobiography: Al Gore
Barocky Road Ice Cream
Bush's Resignation Speech
Cancel My Allowance
Catching Wild Pigs
Democrat or Republican?
Doctor Seuss Goes To Florida
Doctor's Cure for Constipation
Duck Hunting
Economic Lesson in Taxation
Economic Stimulus Payment FAQ
Firearms Refresher Course
Government Service
Hens and Roosters
Hillary's Visit
How Congress Works
How many zeros in a billion?
Hu's On First
Ice Cream Effect
I'm Voting Democrat
It's My Fault
Jack and Bill
Kerry's Job Application
Last Rites
Letter to the President
Liberal vs. Conservative Question
Lincoln-Kennedy Creepy History
Lost Wallet
My Name Is John Kerry
New Truck
New Word For Our Vocabulary
Newsletter From The Boss
Notice of Revocation of Independence
Notice To All Employees
Post Turtle
Redistribution Of Wealth
Sobering Statistic
Thank You, Mr. President
The Ant and the Grasshopper
The Barber
The New National Emblem of the Democratic Party
The Old Man and The Marine
The Rules of Golf: Florida Democrat Style
Thinking
To Be A Good Democrat
Two Alligators
Washington Dilemma
What Did One Senator Say To The Other Senator?
What'd ya say there, Gee-Dubya?
Where Bush Got His Marching Orders
Who's Smarter?
Worst President In History
Hu's On First
(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?
Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.
George: Great. Lay it on me.
Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.
George: That's what I want to know.
Condi: That's what I'm telling you.
George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes.
George: I mean the fellow's name.
Condi: Hu.
George: The guy in China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The new leader of China.
Condi: Hu.
George: The Chinese!
Condi: Hu is leading China.
George: Now whaddya' asking me for?
Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.
George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?
Condi: That's the man's name.
George: That's who's name?
Condi: Yes.
George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.
Condi: That's correct.
George: Then who is in China?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir is in China?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Then who is?
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Yassir?
Condi: No, sir.
George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.
Condi: Kofi?
George: No, thanks.
Condi: You want Kofi?
George: No.
Condi: You don't want Kofi.
George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi?
George: Milk! Will you please make the call?
Condi: And call who?
George: Who is the guy at the U.N?
Condi: Hu is the guy in China.
George: Will you stay out of China?!
Condi: Yes, sir.
George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.
Condi: Kofi.
George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.
(Condi picks up the phone.)
Condi: Rice (Condi Rice), here.
George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?