Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple creatures?

• Your last name stays put
• The garage is all yours
• Wedding plans take care of themselves
• Chocolate is just another snack
• You can be President
• You can never be pregnant
• You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park
• You can wear NO shirt to a water park
• Car mechanics tell you the truth
• The world is your urinal
• You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky
• You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt
• Same work, more pay
• Wrinkles add character
• Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
• People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them
• New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet
• One mood all the time
• Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat
• You know stuff about tanks
• A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase
• You can open all your own jars
• You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
• If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend
• Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack
• Three pairs of shoes are more than enough
• You almost never have strap problems in public
• You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes
• Everything on your face stays its original color
• The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
• You only have to shave your face and neck
• You can play with toys all your life
• One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons
• You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look
• You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife
• You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache
• You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes

No wonder men are happier.